Categories
photography

Worlds without people

Art doesn’t necessarily need to include people, and art that omits them isn’t necessarily inhumane – but we need to resist the allure of the soothing blank.

When I read the line “For its right wing adherents, the absence of humans is a feature, not a bug, of AI art” it felt like a contribution to a conversation I’ve been having in my head for years.

It comes from an essay by Gareth Watkins for New Socialist and resurfaced recently because the US Department of Homeland Security posted a painting called ‘Morning Pledge’ by American artist Thomas Kinkade (1958-2012).

It depicts two schoolboys walking along a street in an idealised small town in 1950s America. It’s kitsch, essentially – the stuff of ‘Who remembers…?’ accounts on Facebook.

Part of the supposed appeal of the image is the promise of space, peace and homogenous white culture. It presents the small town as the antidote to the Lovecraftian nightmare of the big city, with its crowded streets, small skies and complex mix of peoples.

An American desert landscape with two small figures dwarfed by the big sky.
My Darling Clementine, dir. John Ford, 1946.

In America, ‘manifest destiny’ was about heading west to open space, and to freedom. On film in particular, westerns continued to mythologise this expansion throughout the 20th century. That’s especially true of the films of John Ford who fetishises vast desert landscapes, and the brave men who exist in them, in contented isolation.

From manifest destiny it’s only a couple of steps to the idea of ‘Lebensraum’ (living space) which was a key concept justifying the Nazis’ annexation of European nations, and the push into the east.

In a 2023 article, nature writer Richard Smyth argued that the appeal of rewilding programmes sometimes reflects an urge to purge natural spaces of humans, and evidence of human activity:

A strong anti-people streak is evident not only in old-school get-orf-my-land types, but also among the carefully curated hills and vales of the rewilders – a queasy tension, in the latter case, between ‘look at these splendid landscapes!’ and ‘stay the hell away from these splendid landscapes!’

When right wingers complain that “Britain is full!” or overcrowded it only compounds the sense that the left-liberal position must be to embrace and revel in the presence of people, and to resist the allure of spaces without them.

Cropping people from the frame

As someone who is a habitual Camera Haver and Photograph Taker, I’ve been grappling for more than a decade with the question of whether photos should or should not include people.

Photos of the world around us, I mean. Street photography, in other words.

There’s an argument that photographs without people don’t qualify as street photography. Those are just photos of streets. No, street photography at its best captures human beings in motion, living their lives, in all their infinite variety, behaving in fascinating ways.

To capture real life, however, street photographers must be, to some extent, intrusive, voyeuristic, and sly. They snatch images of strangers who either don’t know they’re being photographed, or don’t get chance to object.

Some street photographers push this to the limit. Bruce Gilden is famous for his aggressive technique, thrusting his camera into the faces of strangers and snapping them with full flash. It gives his pictures enormous energy but can also feel like a form of abuse.

British photographer Martin Parr takes a gentler approach but has also been criticised for exploiting or mocking his often working class subjects, betraying snobbery in where he chooses to point his camera.

Where is the line between what street photographers do and the creepy behaviour of social media voyeurs filming young women on nights out?

All of this is why there’s now a view that the only truly ethical way to take photographs of strangers in the street is to ask permission, ideally before you point your camera at them; and to share publicly only images that come with explicit permission from the subject in the form of signed consent documents.

In that context, photos of spaces without people begin to feel like the less problematic (less fascistic) choice.

The corner of a road on an industrial estate with a billboard advertising a McDonald's breakfast sandwich.
East Bristol, June 2025.
A side street lined with 18th century buildings on one side and a modern hotel on the other. There are no people.
Central Bristol, June 2025.

A convenient excuse for misanthropy

My own photographs tend to be of humanless spaces and blanks in the urban landscape. I often spend ages waiting for people to clear the frame, or grab my shot in split second gaps as people pass back and forth through the scene.

One of my more successful photo projects, Bristol Without Cars, relied on this approach for its effect.

I might tell myself this is an ethical choice but it’s also a personal preference.

With or without a camera, I spend hours every week walking through industrial estates near my house rather enjoying their dusty, desert-like emptiness.

Recently, I found myself alone in a Norman church in an apparently deserted village, listening to birdsong and the wind. And I was surprised to hear myself emit a long, contented sigh.

When I think about nerdy billionaires and their post-apocalyptic bunkers, I sometimes wonder if being the last men on earth is their true desire – peace at last! And, uncomfortably, I recognise that urge in myself.

During my Bristol Without Cars project, I thought I was creating rather peaceful, almost utopian images. But others found them unsettling and even post-apocalyptic.

Adding to my sense that the urge to depopulate my photographs is unhealthy is the fact that it’s part of the sales pitch for using AI in image editing: “It’s great for getting rid of people…”

In this world,  people are viewed as clutter, or as a mess to be cleared away. Is it also, perhaps, part of what Tracy Durnell has called “the business borg aesthetic”, in which “Humans are perceived as sources of inefficiency”?

Remember me

I worry about the long-term value of the thousands of largely people-free photographs I take every year. When I choose to photograph bins (as my partner mockingly puts it) rather than humans, I’m not only magically erasing them from the landscape but also from (small H) history.

As time passes, the work of great street photographers gains additional value as documentation of history, and specifically aspects of social history that would otherwise be overlooked.

Two photographs of men with phones to their ears walking right and left respectively.
Men on phones, 2018.

Tish Murtha’s work captures the bodies, the faces and the living spaces of working class English people in ways that now feel profound and vital. This is also true of, say, Chris Killip, or the many citizen photographers whose work is unearthed and published by Cafe Royal books.

This is why I have a guilty secret: I do, in fact, take photographs of strangers in their place in the urban landscape. It’s just that I don’t often share those images in public, or on social media.

No, those are for (small P) posterity. There for me to look at in 30 or 40 years time and remember that I was, in fact, surrounded by humanity in all its wonderful variety.

Categories
Film & TV

The virtual Los Angeles media has built in our brains

I’ve never been to Los Angeles and probably never will. But it’s a city that exists as a high fidelity virtual model in our collective imagination as a result of more than a century of dominance over mass media.

What percentage of American films and TV shows are set in LA? A disproportionate number, I’m certain. And that’s before you take into account those that are filmed there even though they’re set in New York City, Las Vegas, Dallas, or wherever.

As a result, we all know aspects of Los Angeles’s landscape that would otherwise be insignificant to outsiders.

For example, there’s the concrete trough in which its river runs. Built to guard against flash flooding between the 1930s and 1950s it has since become a favourite location for filmmakers looking to shoot car chases and action sequences.

Griffith Observatory is another landmark that turns up in movie after movie, from Rebel Without a Cause to Bowfinger.

Watching Michael Mann’s 1995 film Heat for the first time this week I was struck by the deliberate choice of less frequently filmed locations, often quite anonymous. But even these spaces, beneath flyovers and in the car parks of malls, seemed familiar. If we haven’t seen these exact spots, we’ve seen similar ones in, say, episodes of T.J. Hooker, or Bosch.

Perhaps it’s because filmmakers so often live in Los Angeles that they so often make films about the city, or in which, as the cliché goes, “the city is a character in its own right”.

Films like To Live And Die in L.A. (William Friedkin, 1985) and Once Upon a Time in Hollywood (Quentin Tarantino, 2019) present particular versions of the city. The former shows us a dusty Wild West city of backrooms, guard dogs, and industrial zones. The latter takes us back in time and attempts to magic back into existence the Los Angeles of the director’s childhood.

Model Shop (Jacques Demy, 1969), Cisco Pike (Bill Norton, 1972) and L.A. Confidential (Curtis Hanson, 1997) are all set in ostensibly the same city but each present it from a different perspective, in different light. There are a thousand others.

Together, they allow the outsider to begin to triangulate – to understand how the city fits together, and how it has changed over time.

L.A. Confidential is based on a novel by James Ellroy whose literary version of Los Angeles is both vivid and idiosyncratic. It’s similar to the city presented by Raymond Chandler in his Philip Marlowe novels, or by Chandler’s disciples in their LA private eye stories, only meaner and more brutal. Chandler’s LA is at least romantic, in a cheap, rather superficial way.

The cover of Reyner Banham's book Los Angeles: The Architecture of Four Ecologies.

Chandler was an outsider, born in America but raised and educated in England, and looked at Los Angeles as if it were an alien planet. This is from The Little Sister published in 1949:

Real cities have something else, some individual bony structure under the muck. Los Angeles has Hollywood – and hates it. It ought to consider itself damn lucky. Without Hollywood it would be a mail order city. Everything in the catalogue you could get better somewhere else.

Another British writer who observed Los Angeles from a similar distance was critic Reyner Banham whose 1971 book Los Angeles: The Architecture of Four Ecologies feels like a manual for understanding the city. Read a chapter or two and you’ll start to feel like an insider – as if you’ve seen LA’s top secret schematics.

Beyond literature and highbrow criticism, there are a million other ways that Los Angeles infiltrates the brains of people who live in, say, Luton, or Lübeck. If you listen to podcasts the chances are that you’ve heard the hosts fill the first ten minutes comparing notes on their drives to the studio, the weather, where’s good to eat, and how they’ve been effected by whichever natural disasters or episode of social unrest has most most recently occurred.

It’s an interesting aspect of the parasocial relationships we form with these strangers who murmur unscripted nothings in our ears every week for years on end.

Every month the excellent movie podcast Pure Cinema has an episode running down what’s showing at The New Beverly Cinema in Los Angeles. It’s interesting not only as a list of recommended viewing but also because of the ambient notes on life in the city, including casual asides about which actors have been spotted where, doing what.

Before podcasts there was radio and vast chunks of old radio shows from Los Angeles are now readily available on YouTube. As with podcasts, the pleasure here is in the snippets of chat between songs, and the evocative advertisements.

The songs, though, shouldn’t be ignored. Listening to The Beach Boys, The Byrds and The Monkees, as well as all those Nuggets fodder one-hit wonders, also transports you to Los Angeles.

British music fans talk casually about the Capitol Building and the crack session musicians later christened the Wrecking Crew. The most obsessed listen to hour after hour of bootleg recordings, absorbing the good vibrations of Gold Star Studios in the near silence between takes.

Surely with all of this data – all those episodes of Columbo and Adam-12 – at some point we’ll be able to conjure up a four-dimensional immersive model of a sunny Los Angeles we can wander about in, or even escape into for good.

There have been a few attempts already. The 2011 game L.A. Noire was an attempt to make the world of James Ellroy explorable and playable. To achieve that its creators, Team Bondi, recreated a vast swathe of Los Angeles approximately as it looked and felt in 1947.

It wasn’t perfect but in a rather moving article games journalist Chris Donlan wrote about playing the game with his father who grew up in LA in the 1940s. He found it pretty convincing:

The accuracy with which the city structures and roadways are recreated is really astounding, and the details were almost perfect… To be able to experience it again with my son who was born 20 years after I first left the city was, I think, wonderful for us both…

Then there are the several not-quite Los Angeles cities of the Grand Theft Auto games. The 2004 game GTA: San Andreas gives us Los Santos, an almost parodic version of LA circa 1992. The GTA V from 2013 develops Los Santos further, in higher fidelity, to the point where players were able to shoot their own films in its ultra-realistic environments.

If, like me, you’re not very good at games, there’s also Google Street View – a wonder of the age that so many of us take for granted. It’s easy to lose hours wandering jerkily from one street or roadscape to another, feeling both close to the city and impossibly far away.

Main image: a detail from a Los Angeles street scene by Lee Russell, 1942, by via the Library of Congress website.

Categories
photography

PHOTOS: The Phantom Zone

“As with shadows and reflections, so with portraits; they are often believed to contain the soul of the person portrayed. People who hold this belief are naturally loth to have their likenesses taken; for if the portrait is the soul, or at least a vital part of the person portrayed, whoever possesses the portrait will be able to exercise a fatal influence over the original of it.”

James Frazer, The Golden Bough

A poster which has faded and cracked so that the young woman in the image looks as if her head has been opened like a boiled egg.
A close up of a shop fascia which has warped and cracked in the sun so that the woman on the image has blank, black eyes and a distorted, mad smile.
A shop fascia which has cracked and distorted so that the face of a woman can just be discerned in the warped vinyl. She appears to be screaming or crying out.

“One evening I was walking along a path, the city was on one side and the fjord below. I felt tired and ill. I stopped and looked out over the fjord – the sun was setting, and the clouds turning blood red. I sensed a scream passing through nature; it seemed to me that I heard the scream.”

Edvard Munch, diary entry

A ripped, faded poster which appears to show someone singing, only now their eyes are blank and it looks more like they're screaming.
A poster outside a pub which is supposed to show a football fan cheering on his team but his mouth is open wide and fixed in what looks like a cry of terror.
A shop window with a poster of a woman screaming with joy. She has her fingers up to her mouth. Her lips are darkened with lipstick.
A faded, cracked poster with two children closing their eyes and bearing their teeth.

“The eye is the lamp of the body. If your eye is clear, your whole body will be full of light.”

Matthew 6:22

“The eyes are the first thing you have to destroy because they have seen too many bad things.”

Lucio Fulci

A close up of a poster on a bus shelter. Someone has placed two black squares over the eyes of the model blanking them out.
A torn poster. What remains are scraps of a woman's face with mouth, nose, forehead, but no eyes.
An advertisement in in the window of a chemist advertising vaccinations. It says JAB and below is a phot of an old lady who is supposed to be smiling but is actually grimacing. Dots of black spray paint cover her eyes and the paint is running down her face.
A biilboard with a woman in sunglasses shouting with joy. She has hear hands up in front of her face. Protest stickers have been plastered across her face. She looks horrified.
“When a person take his pictures, is there any possibility of some amount of his soul getting trapped in that picture?”

Question on Quora, 2016
A portrait of a man on a poster which has been pasted to a surface with heavy black lines, making it look as if he's imprisoned.
A poster with a woman in profile. It's been torn so that a flap of paper conceals her face rendering it blank and inscrutable.
A torn poster revealing just the snarling red lips of a presumably furious model now trapped in the phantom zone.

These photos were taken between 2019 and 2025, mostly in Bristol, but also in London, Istanbul, and elsewhere.

Categories
Fiction weird fiction

FICTION: Do Not Eat

Do you get the urge or is it just me? You’re walking along and you see a half-eaten sandwich lying on the ground, covered with bits of grit and crawling with ants, and you think: I want to eat that.

You don’t, obviously. But you think it.

Like how you consider throwing your wallet into the river every time you cross the bridge in town. Or feel your hand edging towards the emergency brake on the train during your commute, specifically because there’s a sign telling you not to. That’s exactly what it’s like when you see a plastic glass half full of cola sitting on a wall and you think, I want to drink that, and eat the chunks that are floating in it, whatever they are. Do you really never get that? Really? I do. All the time.

You don’t do it, as I say, obviously you don’t do it, but it’s touch and go sometimes. When nobody’s looking, when you’ve had a really bad day and everything’s turned to absolute shit, you think, if I eat something I’ll feel better. And if you’re going to eat something, why not that scoop of ice cream that’s been dropped on the pavement and is still mostly solid, even though it’s sent out sticky brown runners towards the gutter? Imagine just scooping it up in your fingers and sticking it in your mouth in one neat move. If you get it right you could leave behind the bit that’s been in contact with the pavement and just get the good stuff that’s probably hardly even been licked. You get so you don’t mind a bit of lick, anyway. People snog strangers all the time – how is a bit of lick on an ice cream any different?

It started when I was a washer-up in a chain restaurant as a teenager. The stuff that used to come back uneaten! Chicken nuggets from the kids’ meals, they’re the ones that tempt you the most, and cakes. Imagine throwing away good food like that and then going home to an economy burger, oven chips, and frozen peas. So, yes, you do eat the odd bit here and there, when they look fairly clean and intact. Nobody notices and nobody cares. It’s like a little bonus, a little treat, and all for free.

One particularly bad shift, though, when the manager had been snippy with me, and I knew it wouldn’t be much better at home, I confess that I did once give myself an extra treat and eat some gristle left over from a steak. It had been chewed and spat out. I chewed it again myself, like gum, while I used the extendable hose to rinse gravy from a pile of plates. You chew and chew and eventually it softens up. That’s why people chew gum, because it’s calming and meditative.

Licking ketchup and melted cheese from the insider of a discarded burger wrapper, that’s another good one. It’s like you’ve eaten the burger without having eaten the burger. Sometimes, when the wrapper’s been out all night, blowing round the retail park car park, it’ll have picked up crunchy bits of glass or splinters of wood. You clear the paper with your tongue and it leaves you feeling clean, too, like you’ve groomed the dirt off your own body.

Nobody eats the salad from a kebab, have you noticed that? On Saturday and Sunday mornings you can pick up all sorts: trampled iceberg lettuce salad, pickled chilli peppers, pitta breads soaked with grease and garlic sauce where the bread has become like a sponge in the morning dew. Get your five a day.

A bit of mold doesn’t even do any harm. You eat blue cheese, don’t you? They say it’s good for you to put bacteria into your gut. There was a whole bag of shopping once, hanging on a railing. A pack of pittas gone blue all over, a cucumber rotten in its plastic sleeve. You can slurp that like an ice pop. You can’t just leave it hanging there. You can’t just walk past, letting good food go to waste, even if it does leave you feeling too full to move. Beats feeling empty inside, that’s what I say.

Or what about those full plastic bottles you find in the gutter? It might be apple juice or beer, it might not, but waste not want not. You’ve got to scratch the itch sometimes, you’ve got to give into the urge.

Some people take roadkill home and cook it. They have freezers full of the stuff. I say, why go to all that bother? The good stuff is like jerky, dried naturally in the sun, seasoned with engine oil and brake fluid. Does your mouth water when you smell petrol? Mine does. Chicken wings, too – it’s like eating chicken wings. Lots of little bones to chew the tough meat from. You really feel as if you’ve earned your meal.

When people feed good bread to the ducks, that breaks my heart. There’s kids starving and they’re throwing bread into the pond in the park – are you serious? It’s not even good for ducks to eat bread, is it? If you have a small net, it’s easy enough to fish the bread out out, or you can just use your hands. The texture is like nothing else. Municipal caviar, I call it.

Dregs from drinks cans, too. Lots of variety, a little dribble of lots of different things, cider or Fanta or whatever, and you can always spit out the cig ends and the insects.

I like a mystery, a blind taste test. You don’t always know what’s in a holdall you find dumped on a verge, do you? There’s no way to be sure if it’s been there a while. You just have to get stuck in and enjoy it for what it is, all of it, pounds and pounds of raw, sweating meat. Almost enough to fill the infinite empty space inside you – not quite, but almost. The only problem is that sometimes you worry you might have helped to dispose of evidence, when they start talking about that holdall on the news, but how are you to know?

I find there’s really no need to go home at all these days, or to go to work, not when you can eat three square meals a day out and about for free. You just need to have a good eye and a strong stomach. And your stomach gets stronger, too, the more you do it. What’s at home, anyway? Much better to be in the fresh air, enjoying all of nature’s bounty.

Oh, see there, under the brambles – a yoghurt pot that looks to be, yes it is, almost half full. Now, don’t you get the urge to eat that? Don’t you? Is it just me?


A quote from Verity Holloway: "Impressively eerie and packed with shocks... moments of powerful poignancy and startling strangeness. You'll want to linger over these stories." Next to it is the cover of Intervals of Darkness with a black background and red details. The illustration is of a person casting a long shadow. Nearby is another shadow suggesting a lurking but hidden figure.

If you enjoyed ‘Do Not Eat’ check out Intervals of Darkness, my most recent collection of weird stories, which is available as an eBook and paperback.

Categories
weird fiction

Broken Veil: indescribable horrors gently whispered in your ear

The six-part podcast series Broken Veil, created and presented by Joel Morris and Will Maclean, exploits the inherent ‘truthiness’ of the podcast format to chill its audience.

When the first episode landed a few weeks ago I wasn’t sure if it was an attempt to jump on the Uncanny bandwagon by telling a supposedly true ghost story, or a clever fiction.

    I suspected the latter thanks to the involvement of Maclean, best known for his 2020 novel The Apparition Phase. It didn’t take long to spot tells which confirmed that, yes, this was a drama – albeit one that felt, at times, uncomfortably real.

    Those tells? Acting as if you’re not acting is difficult, for one thing. Broken Veil is cleverly directed to minimise this problem with actors apparently briefed on the story they need to tell and encouraged to improvise around a loose script.

    Conversations recorded on noisy microphones, in noisy cafes, in open spaces, or in moving vehicles, also dragged it a touch closer to verisimilitude.

    I’ve listened to a lot of audio drama that feels like stage school kids in sound-proofed studios, over-egging their performances, and slurping their tea too aggressively, too near the microphone. Broken Veil felt light years ahead of that. But still not completely, seamlessly, perfectly convincing, even if it got very near.

    Despite deciding that it was fiction, there continued to be moments when I doubted myself. Perhaps it was more complex than I’d realised. Perhaps some of the incidents described were real, and only some were fictional, or fictionalised.

    The spooky, moody, Scandi-noir score was another tick in the ‘feels real’ column. This is how true crime and supernatural podcasts tend to sound.

    Another was the way episodes were edited to finish on revelations and cliffhangers. Co-creator Morris is an expert in understanding and documenting the patterns and structures behind stories, and comedy, and he applies that expertise here to apply the unwritten rules of of non-fiction podcasting.

    Just as real non-fiction podcasts tend to do, it also went off on tangents, and gave over whole episodes to what felt like ‘side quests’. Each made the story feel more complex and more confusing, in pleasing ways. When the real actress Gabrielle Glaister (Bob from Blackadder) turned up playing herself it worked both as a standalone story and as a ‘convincer’.

    Horror, or weird fiction, often thrives in that space between truth and fantasy. To paraphrase Fox Mulder from The X-Files (a reference point for Broken Veil) “We want to believe.”

    Like Morris and Maclean, I’m of the generation that saw Ghostwatch air live on the BBC in 1992. It was clearly labelled as a drama, with an on-screen writing credit for Stephen Volk. But it employed non-actors like Sarah Greene and Michael Parkinson, and the look and feel of live TV, to play with the audience’s perceptions of reality.

    Other touchpoints in a similar vein are Alternative 3, a 1977 mockumentary which was originally scheduled for 1 April but actually aired much later in the year, and so fooled many viewers; and The Blair Witch Project, which triggered the found footage movie boom of the early 21st century.

    Throughout Broken Veil’s short arc the hosts frequently invoke cultural references like these, along with myths and legends of the paranormal that a certain type of British child has latched onto and absorbed for decades.

    The Philadelphia Experiment gets a mention, for example, as does Matthew Hopkins, the Witchfinder General, and the ‘backrooms’ internet meme.

    All of these are shortcuts to the mood the creators want to create: paranoid, hauntological, psychogeographical – layers of muddled meaning on worn-out, overdubbed tape.

    As with many weird stories, the opening is the strongest section. It’s when the sense of reality is strongest and the story being told feels most plausible. A challenge for creators of weird fiction is that setting up a mystery is fun, and it’s what people enjoy. They think they want a solution but no explanation you can provide will be as pleasurable as drifting, bewildered, in the unknown.

    If there’s a problem with Broken Veil, it’s the pacing. Though it’s been a success, at least in terms of podcast charts and critical commentary, it was a side project for two busy creatives, and that shows in its brief run, and hurried denouement.

    The final episode in particular felt like several weeks’ worth of content crammed together into too small a space. And of course the opaque solution half provided wasn’t wholly satisfactory – how could it be?

    I would have been quite happy to listen to a longer, slower version of this podcast that revealed small nuggets of information over months. And I wouldn’t have minded had it never resolved.

    Just being in this world, with two softly-spoken, slightly geeky hosts murmuring strange stories to each other, was pleasure enough.

    Broken Veil is available through all the usual podcast services.

    Categories
    Film & TV

    These other Londons: the imagined city of the backlots

    London, like New York, is often too busy, and too much in flux, to play itself on film. So, time after time, filmmakers rebuild it on backlots – with varying degrees of accuracy.

    Each of these other Londons represents a particular vision of the city, and conveys the creators’ preconceptions, prejudices and perspectives.

    Even the best of them never quite look real. On high definition video, more than ever, we can see that ‘bricks’ are lines etched into plaster, and that their streets merge with painted ‘flats’ or matte paintings.

    They’re fantasies. But are they any worse than, say, Dublin, or Riga, or Budapest, with every stone and brick the wrong colour, putting on their best cockney accents?

    I’ll take the artistry and illusion of a backlot set over Prague scattered with red buses and phone boxes any day. (Even if that backlot is, itself, in Prague.)

    Stand-in Londons in Hollywood

    Old Hollywood loved to build Londons.

    Cedric Gibbons created one at MGM for David Copperfield, directed by George Cukor in 1935. On screen, the backlot construction was supplemented with matte paintings.

    Parts of that set, later known as ‘Copperfield Court’ or ‘Copperfield Courtyard’, were used in other productions, including on TV, for years to come.

    What looks like a Victorian or Georgian terrace with an ornate bow-fronted shop.
    Copperfield Courtyard at MGM in 1949. SOURCE: The Phantom of the Backlots.

    At Universal, before Frankenstein, James Whale directed a version of Waterloo Bridge, released in 1931. For that production, a misty wartime London was created by Charles Hall, including a replica of the bridge itself that used forced perspective to suggest scale.

    A vista of London with Waterloo Bridge in the foreground, bustling with people.
    A scene from Waterloo Bridge, 1931.

    Hall and Whale were both British and perhaps this added to the relative realism of the production.

    In his 1976 book Caligari’s Cabinet and Other Grand Illusions production designer Léon Barsacq shares a promotional image from the 1933 production of Noël Coward’s Cavalcade by Frank Lloyd for Fox. Barsacq also quotes the text that came with the photograph:

    “Why! This is a section of the Strand!” exclaimed Miriam Jordan, whose home is in London, when taken to the London ‘set’ for ‘Cavalcade’ on the Fox Films lot. In the background is a typical London building and at the left is an exact replica of a small London park. Natives of the British Empire and world travelers are amazed at the fidelity with which William Darling, art director of Fox Films studios, reproduced London street scenes. Even the lamp posts are authentic.

    Even after the war, when many Americans had seen Britain for themselves, Hollywood continued to film London under the Californian sun.

    Dock walls and cobbled streets at night while various men prepare to rumble.
    A scene from Kiss the Blood off My Hands, 1948, showing a recreation of Wapping in Hollywood.

    Burt Lancaster starred in and produced the British-set Kiss the Blood off My Hands – one of the all-time great film noir titles – in 1948. It was shot at Universal on an extensive recreation of the East End of London, and Wapping in particular, that supposedly represented 30 blocks of houses, warehouses and wharves.

    At the other end of the scale, there was the brightly coloured, sugar-icing version of London seen in Mary Poppins, shot at the Disney studios in Burbank. Along with many matte paintings there was also a large physical set for Cherry Tree Lane, with more forced perspective, including on the cherry trees.

    Backup Londons near London

    Why recreate London when you’re on the outskirts of the real thing? Why not film on the actual streets? For convenience. Because London changes too fast for historical drama. And, perhaps, because an air of fantasy might be desirable.

    In 1961, Cliff Richard, ‘the British Elvis’, was a huge star. The Young Ones was to be his first serious star vehicle, directed by Sidney J. Furie, and the budget justified the construction of a “quite extensive backlot town” of “relatively anonymous West London streets”,  as described by Jonathan Bignell.

    Cliff Richard and Carole Gray dancing on a fake London street with shop fronts, red phone boxes, and a bench.
    A scene from The Young Ones, 1961.

    Bignell’s particular interest is that this set lingered on and was used and reused, dressed and redressed, to represent not only London but also locations around the world in British TV shows such as The Saint, The Champions and Randall and Hopkirk (Deceased).

    A police officer guards a hole in the road on a fake London street.
    The Counterfeit Constable, 1964.

    A little later, at Shepperton, a 1964 French production, The Counterfeit Constable, called for the construction of another London in miniature.

    These streets also hung about and, with tweaks, represented everything from the 18th century city in Moll Flanders to post-apocalyptic future London in one of the Doctor Who films.

    The never-never London of Sherlock Holmes

    The backup London at Shepperton described above was also used, with adjustments, in the 1965 Hammer film A Study in Terror, starring John Neville as Sherlock Holmes.

    Over the years, however, Holmes has prompted the construction of several elaborate Londons in his own right.

    A London street set under construction with scaffolding holding up flimsy facades.
    The set for The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes under construction. SOURCE: Library of Congress.

    In 1969, Alexander Trauner built a long stretch of Baker Street at Pinewood for Billy Wilder’s The Private Life of Sherlock Holmes. (He’d previously constructed a very convincing Paris for Wilder’s Irma la Douce in Los Angeles.)

    This set would also linger on, decaying, and appear in distinctly less prestigious British productions such as Carry on at Your Convenience.

    A version of Baker Street with terraced houses opening their doors straight onto the pavement.
    Baker Street at Granada. SOURCE: Horslip5 on Flickr.

    A decade or so later, Granada in Manchester set about bringing Sherlock Holmes to TV with Jeremy Brett in the lead role. For this expensive production it constructed its own Baker Street – just around the corner from its recreation of a red-brick Manchester terrace for the long-running soap opera Coronation Street.

    This set is particularly interesting because it’s one many British children visited over the years as part of the Granada Studios Tour. I went myself, as a dorky teenage Holmesian, and felt as if I’d gone to heaven. (Years later, I worked on the real Baker Street for about six months, and there was no romance about that at all.)

    When Guy Ritchie filmed his Sherlock Holmes with Robert Downey Jr., released in 2009, he also had a large scale Baker Street set to play with – albeit one built for a Harry Potter film and refitted. Rather than forced perspective, as employed by Trauner 40 years earlier, this set was extended with green screen and CGI. It was not an improvement, in artistic terms.

    Recreating the East End

    London’s East End is another common target for cinematic recreators – not least because the real East End was so extensively changed by, first, the Blitz, and then post-war remodelling.

    Sherlock Holmes and Dr Watson walk through the East End after Jack the Ripper has committed another murder.
    Murder by Decree, 1979.

    In Murder by Decree, a 1979 Sherlock Holmes film directed by Bob Clark and starring Christopher Plummer, Baker Street is played by Barton Street, a well-preserved thoroughfare in Westminster. But the East End, where Jack the Ripper stalks, was constructed at Elstree (Whitechapel streets) and Shepperton (docks and wharves). It’s very convincing, even sharing the screen with real locations in Bermondsey.

    Twenty or so years later a film with a very similar plot, From Hell, directed by the Hughes Brothers, was shot on a set outside Prague designed by Martin Childs. Released in 2001, it fell between the cracks as the internet came into being, and the set is unfortunately not well documented. In ‘production notes’ of uncertain provenance at cinema.com Childs is quoted as saying:

    “We couldn’t find anyplace here that resembled Whitechapel from all angles, so we ended up building it in the middle of a field. It became the unexpected highlight of this entire enterprise… We were very lucky that Prague was undergoing a major restoration and digging up many of its streets… because we were able to borrow cobblestones from the city…”

    This set included versions of The Ten Bells pub and Nicholas Hawksmoor’s Christ Church, Spitalfields. The film might not be a masterpiece but the set might have been.

    Another perhaps surprisingly careful reconstruction of the East End appears in Till Death Us Do Part, the 1969 feature film adaptation of the TV sitcom starring Warren Mitchell as Alf Garnett.

    A view of an East End street with railway line, pub, and terraced houses.
    From the trailer for Till Death Us Do Part.

    Several streets and corners are recreated in loving detail, with the brick convincingly soot blackened, and a railway arch to terminate the street. This neat capsule set allows director Norman Cohen to take us from the 1930s to the 1960s by changing details such as the brewery branding on the very realistic pub.

    What it’s very like, in fact, is the Coronation Street set mentioned above or, jumping forward to the mid-1980s, the set constructed at BBC Elstree for another long-running soap, Eastenders

    Albert Square, which has been on TV every week since 1985, was supposedly based largely on Fassett Square in Dalston, and offers a snapshot of pre-gentrification East London. The set was carefully weathered and distressed to resemble real East London streets and I suspect fooled many people into thinking it was filmed on location.

    Over the years, the set expanded, gaining new offshoot streets and details. In recent years, rebuilt and refined for the high-definition age, it’s even, finally, gained some modern flats and new-build townhouses.

    The bland Bulgarian London

    One of my favourite recreations of London – as in, one with which I am grimly fascinated – is at Nu Boyana Studios outside Sofia, Bulgaria.

    Its standing London street set was built, I believe, for the 2016 action thriller London Has Fallen, and includes a version of the forecourt and entrance to St Paul’s Cathedral. More importantly, it also has several streets that reflect what too much of London really feels like today.

    A bland London street with an Irish pub and a shop or two.
    SOURCE: Nu Boyana on Facebook.

    There are bland modern flats, like those which have filled in every available gap in East London. There are bland modern shop fronts painted in shades of grey. There are rows of bland Mayfair houses, too neat and too tidy, where it’s clear nobody actually lives. There’s a bland Irish theme pub that looks like no fun at all. There’s even a Patisserie Valerie.

    This set crops up in cheap Christmas movies and cheap action movies – the type that go straight to streaming, and maybe feature an older actor just long enough to feature his face prominently on the poster.

    I’m pretty sure I see it in adverts, too, providing a shiny, simple version of London without any of the grime or graffiti.

    I could go on…

    There are so many other Londons.

    The streets of Poplar constructed for Call the Midwife in the grounds of stately home in Surrey, for example; the fantastical Fleet Street built at Pinewood for Tim Burton’s Sweeney Todd; the Soho built for Julien Temple’s Absolute Beginners; the other Soho constructed on an airfield for Amazon’s Good Omens; or the 1930s suburban street slowly bombed to bits in John Boorman’s blitz memoir Hope & Glory; or…

    Well, like I say, I could go on.

    Together, these many peculiar, partial Londons add up to a complete imaginary city that helps us see and appreciate the real one in all its infinite depth.

    Categories
    Fiction

    FICTION: The Short Stay

    All they want to do is get out of their wet clothes but the key doesn’t work. As Hannah struggles, Joe stands behind her sniffing the warm, musty air of the corridor.

    ‘Stinks of mice.’

    Hannah tries pulling the key out a little as she turns it. She tries pulling up on the door handle. She tries pushing the key harder into the door.

    ‘Let me try,’ says Joe.

    He pushes her aside, reaches for the key, and turns it without the slightest trouble.

    ‘Easy, see?’

    The flat is smaller than it looked in the photographs on the booking website. The laminate flooring is scuffed and there is a vegetal smell.

    Joe lugs his bag into the bedroom leaving Hannah to carry her own.

    ‘Fucking rail replacement fucking buses,’ says Joe, more to himself than to her. ‘“Let’s spend Christmas somewhere different,” she says. Oh, yeah, nice one. I don’t know why we ever bother going anywhere with the state of the trains in this country.’

    ‘Never mind,’ says Hannah. ‘We’ll have an early night tonight and explore the city properly tomorrow.’

    Joe hangs his sodden black trenchcoat over the back of a chair and pulls his wet shirt away from his bony torso. Looking around he puffs out, despairing and disbelieving.

    ‘Merry Christmas to us, and happy anniversary.’

    ‘This is just a base, though, isn’t it?’ says Hannah, her voice beginning to crack.

    ‘You’d better change,’ he replies. ‘You look like a drowned cat.’

    Hannah pushes a snake of dyed black hair behind her ear, her bangles rattling, and slides her glasses up her nose.

    Joe won’t look at her. As he heads to the bathroom with their shared toiletry bag he slides past without making contact.

    Alone, Hannah listens to the room for a moment. It has no sound at all. It’s too small and too full of furniture to reverberate. She wonders how many flats they managed to squeeze into the former warehouse when they converted it. Too many, anyway.

    She hears the sounds of Joe using the toilet, the flush, the shower. Bathroom smells, shit and lime-scented gel, fill the small flat.

    She removes her dripping dress and stands in her underwear, shivering and goose-bumped, while she unpacks her bag. She puts on pyjama bottoms and an oversized t-shirt and heads to the combined sitting room and dining area.

    There are two windows looking out over an office block. Only a few lights are on – a meeting room on the first floor, an office on the sixth – so the wall of glass forms a blank, black mirror. She moves and spots her own reflection, sees herself doubled, distorted, reflected, shadowed. The flat’s windows open a few inches, not enough to jump from, but enough to let in frosty air and sounds from the street below: a whisper, a shrieking laugh, and the crunch of broken glass.

    Joe emerges from the bathroom wrapped in a towel. His fine white hair is plastered to his head and his body looks thinner and paler than ever.

    ‘All yours,’ he says and disappears into the bedroom.

    Hannah goes into the bathroom and locks the door. She can’t use the toilet because it’s not private enough for her to relax, but she sits on the seat for a while. There’s no window, only an extractor fan that hums at an irritating frequency. After a while she gives up and gets up to wash. Before she picks up the soap, she removes her wedding ring. It’s a struggle to get it over the knuckle, over the swell of flesh it pushes before it, but sheer force does the job. She places the ring carefully on the glass shelf above the sink. The metal clicks into place as if magnetised. Hannah washes her hands, neck and face, then dries herself with the only other towel in the flat. She flosses, cleans her teeth, and ties her hair up with an elasticated band.

    When she reaches for the wedding ring, it is gone.

    Her fingers crab and scrape around. She inspects the full length of the glass shelf. She drops to her knees and looks beneath the sink, finding only a tangle of cobwebs and hair. She looks under the bath and behind the toilet. She checks the plughole. No, it couldn’t have fallen down there, the strainer would have caught it. She pats the pockets of her pyjama bottoms. Finally, she looks into the toilet bowl where perhaps, she thinks, it might have rolled, which would be just her luck. Nothing.

    ‘What are you doing in there? Come to bed so I can turn the light off.’

    Hannah feels a flutter in her heart.

    She opens the door and, hesitating, steps across the hall to the bedroom.

    He is already curled up beneath the duvet, his head almost buried.

    ‘I’ve lost my wedding ring,’ she says in a weak voice.

    Joe emerges and peers at her, blinking and small-eyed.

    ‘What? When?’

    ‘Just now. Freshening up.’

    He groans.

    ‘It can’t have gone far. We’ll find it in the morning. I’ll find it.’

    She climbs into bed and reaches out for Joe.

    ‘Christ, you’re cold,’ he says, when her hand brushes his back.

    He turns off the bedside lamp.

    Exhausted but awake, Hannah lies and listens. Apart from Joe’s soft snoring, there is something else in the silence – the non-sound of someone holding their breath and holding still.

    The morning is bright and Joe’s mood has improved a little. He even makes the coffee, bringing two cups into the bedroom.

    ‘Four sachets they’ve given us, and four little pots of fake milk. Stingy bastards.’

    Hannah draws her knees up beneath the duvet and hugs them with one curled arm, the other lifting the steaming coffee cup to her mouth at intervals. Joe stares at his phone which, perhaps subconsciously, he angles so that Hannah can’t see the screen.

    ‘Can you have a look for my ring?’ she asks.

    ‘What? Oh, yeah, sure. In a minute.’

    After a second or two he looks up from his screen and turns to her.

    ‘Why do you take your wedding ring off at all?’

    ‘It’s more hygienic,’ she says. ‘I don’t want it to get dirty under there.’

    ‘Yeah, but if you leave it on you’re putting it in hot soapy water. So it gets cleaned. It’s probably more hygienic that way, if anything.’

    He turns back to his phone, chews his thumbnail to tidy the edges.

    ‘It’s supposed to symbolise eternity, isn’t it?’ he mutters. ‘Commitment. I never take mine off.’

    ‘What I don’t understand is how I lost it. It definitely didn’t roll and there’s nowhere for it to go.’

    Joe puts his phone on the bedside table and limps into the bathroom groaning. She watches as he inspects the shelf, the sink, the floor, the plughole.

    ‘Probably got taken by the house elves,’ he says as he comes back to the bedroom. ‘Try asking for it back.’

    ‘How does that work?’

    Stretching a t-shirt over his head and angular arms Joe says, muffled: ‘Hey, house elves – may I please have my wedding ring back? Like that.’

    Hannah mutters the request under her breath. It doesn’t work, at least not immediately.

    Joe spends another ten minutes investigating the bathroom before they go out and emerges with a shrug.

    ‘Sometimes there are gaps around the pipework but everything is sealed tight in there. I don’t know how you do it, I really don’t.’

    Over an expensive breakfast at a cafe with oatmeal coloured walls and smashed avocado on sourdough toast Hannah says:

    ‘Let’s just forget about the ring and try to have a nice Christmas anyway. Just the two of us, somewhere new. We need to decorate the flat a bit. Brighten it up. And get some treats in.’

    ‘Beer. Wine. Gin.’

    They spend the morning of the day before Christmas Eve shopping, buying a tiny tree with twinkling fibre-optic lights, a plastic wreath, and a candle that’s supposed to smell of fir trees. Joe lugs two heavy bags back from the supermarket and opens his first can of beer at exactly midday as he flips through channels on the TV.

    As she lays out slices of ham, cheese and salami on a plate, and cuts a supermarket baguette into small rounds, Hannah looks at her hands. They look different without the ring, obviously, but do they look better?

    ‘We should go to the pub or something,’ says Joe after lunch, two cans of beer down. ‘While there’s still, like, an hour of daylight.’

    They wrap up in coats, scarves, and hats and head out into the city. There are Christmas lights up in the centre and a busker is playing ‘Jingle Bells’ on an accordion. Hannah leads them to the cathedral which they circle, but Joe doesn’t want to go inside. The light begins to die and the grey sky turns flat, first, then begins to shade to blue. They drift back to the shopping precinct and its bright lights.

    ‘That place looks cosy,’ says Joe, spotting a half-timbered pub called Ye Olde Bear. He heads through the door and Hannah follows. It’s crowded and hot with half the customers in novelty Christmas jumpers. Joe pushes his way to the bar and raises a hand to get the attention of the barman. His wedding ring, a thick, plain band, glints amid the fairy lights. He orders Hannah’s usual half of lager and a pint of cider for himself.

    Because it’s Christmas, when the usual rules don’t apply, they both drink too much. Hannah’s usual limit is three pints but she ends up drinking five. Dinner is two cheese rolls and a packet of crisps. Joe is on eight pints when he decides to switch to single malt whisky, because it’s Christmas, and Hannah agrees to have one, too, because it’s Christmas, and suddenly, it’s nearly midnight and the pub is closing around them.

    They go from giggling arm-in-arm to arguing in no time at all. They both need the toilet but Joe insists on pissing behind a wheelie bin, prolonging her discomfort. He wants to find a kebab shop. She begins to cry, for no particular reason, just everything, and he raises his voice without meaning to.

    ‘Go back to the flat, then! Take the key! I’ll see you there when I’ve had my chicken doner.’

    ‘You want me to walk back on my own, in the dark, in a strange city?’

    ‘Fuck sake… Come with me, then!’

    ‘I really need a wee.’

    He shoves the keyring into her hands.

    ‘I’ll see you there in, like, fifteen minutes.’

    Hannah watches him stagger away and wonders what it is she feels, other than heartburn from the whisky and a pressing pain in her bladder.

    The next morning, Christmas Eve, she wakes with a head that feels like concrete and a papery mouth. Joe is not with her. She croaks his name then checks her phone. There are several missed calls and messages from Joe, each more desperate than the last. She must have fallen asleep, or passed out, leaving him stuck in the street outside all night. The last message reads:

    ‘Will sleep in park. Fuck you.’

    Dressing hurriedly, wanting to vomit, she rushes out and downstairs, trying to work out which park he might have meant. She calls him and listens to his phone ring as she walks over frosty cobbles. He doesn’t answer.

    The nearest park is by the riverside. She makes a complete circuit, checking each bench and shelter, looking at the single-person tents concealed in the hedgerows and copses. She shouts his name, screams it, constantly redialling his number.

    ‘What if he comes back to the flat and I’m not there?’ she thinks after a while. She returns to wait for him.

    Wide awake now, shaking with cold and adrenalin, she sits down in the kitchen. She closes her eyes, breathes out, breathes in, breathes out, breathes in, but calm never comes.

    Her eyes pop open when something slams into the tabletop.

    There in front of her something is spinning and shining. She is mesmerised. It slows to a teeter and then falls flat on its side. Her wedding ring. 

    She sees the second ring fall, seeming to appear from somewhere just above her head, before it hits the table with force. It is thicker and heavier and begins to roll. To stop it reaching the table’s edge she reaches out and slaps it flat.

    It feels hot.

    She looks at her palm.

    A perfect red circle has been burned into the skin.


    Image based on a photograph by Luwadlin Bosman at unsplash.com

    Categories
    Film & TV

    The infinite supply of BBC ghost stories for Christmas

    There are only eight episodes of the BBC Ghost Story for Christmas, produced between 1971 and 1978. That’s not enough. Here are some suggestions for where to go next.

    First, let’s address a technicality: the 1968 adaptation of M.R. James’s ‘Oh, Whistle, and I’ll Come to You, My Lad’ directed by Jonathan Miller was a standalone film in the Omnibus strand.

    It inspired A Ghost Story for Christmas and is often spoken about as part of that strand. In the unlikely event you haven’t seen it – start there!

    Seven of the eight core episodes were directed by Lawrence Gordon Clark. He wrote the first two before handing over that duty to people like John Bowen and David Rudkin.

    The final episode of that original run, ‘The Ice House’, from 1978, was written by Bowen and directed by Derek Lister.

    The short films and television episodes listed below aren’t all ghost stories. And they weren’t all produced by the BBC.

    Some are lighter, some are darker. Some are quite cinematic, others distinctly low-budget studio productions.

    I’ve chosen them because they trigger in me something of the same feeling I get from, say, ‘Lost Hearts’, an M.R. James adaptation with a period setting, or from ‘Stigma’, which has an original story and a contemporary setting.

    If I’ve omitted a film you like, it might be because I don’t know about it – do leave suggestions in the comments. But it’s probably more likely at this point that I do know about it but decided it didn’t fit.

    ‘The Beast’ from the 1982 West Country Tales series, for example, doesn’t feel to me like the same thing at all, enjoyable as it is.

    1. Dead of Night: The Exorcism, 1972

    Written and directed by Don Taylor this episode of the anthology series Dead of Night works as both (a) a terrifying ghost story and (b) a commentary on class. It has a group of well-to-do friends gathering for Christmas in an old working man’s cottage which one couple has bought and renovated. The title hints at a twist.

    BFI DVD (out of print) | YouTube

    2. Dead of Night: A Woman Sobbing, 1972

    Another story from the same anthology series which combines social commentary with effective, shiver-inducing horror. John Bowen’s script is about unhappy marriages, the sidelining of middle-aged women, and menopausal depression. Anna Massey is a brilliant actress and there’s less scenery chewing than in some TV plays of the period. And the sobbing woman, symbolic as she may be, is as creepy as hell.

    BFI DVD (out of print) | YouTube

    3. Wessex Tales: The Withered Arm

    Adapted from a Thomas Hardy story this has the perfect mix of bleak landscapes, horrifying moments, and stillness. It’s got a distinct folk horror feel, too.

    BBC iPlayer

    4. Beasts: Baby, 1976

    The whole of this series written by Nigel Kneale is interesting, and very much worth watching. But this is the episode which feels, to me, closest in tone to the work of Lawrence Gordon Clark and his collaborators. It’s about a haunted house, essentially, with Jane Wymark as a pregnant woman and Simon MacCorkindale as her VERY SHOUTY husband. They find a mummified animal in the walls of their cottage and (probably) supernatural occurrences ensue.

    Network DVD (out of print, eBay) | YouTube

    5. Mr. Humphreys and his Inheritance, 1976

    A 1970s M.R. James adaptation ought to hit all the right notes but this very short adaptation of a lesser-known James story is flawed and slight. It was made by Yorkshire Television as an educational piece to demonstrate the power of music in film which means it has intrusive music throughout. The pay-off is worth 15 minutes of anyone’s time, though – one of those psychedelic, nightmare images that works so well on grainy 16mm film.

    YouTube

    6. A Child’s Voice, 1978

    This is often described online as a BBC production, presumably as a bit of search engine optimisation clickbaitery. Not only is it not a BBC production – it is not even British. It was produced by the Irish company B.A.C. Films and filmed, I believe, in Dublin, with an Irish director, Kieran Hickey, and Irish crew. The script is by a Brit, though – film critic David Thomson. It stars T.P. McKenna as a writer who has a cult following reading his own ghost stories on the radio late at night. Then a character from one of those stories begins to call him on the telephone…

    YouTube

    7. Tarry-Dan Tarry-Dan Scarey Old Spooky Man, 1978

    A recent discovery for me, this BBC production was written by Peter McDougall and directed by John Reardon. It’s set and was shot in Cornwall and tells the story of a troubled young man who becomes obsessed with a local tramp, and has nightmares about the stained glass in a local church. It’s Penda’s Fen adjacent but with a grittier, tougher feel, as Kim Newman has written about on his blog

    YouTube

    8. Casting the Runes, 1979

    This is a big one being an M.R. James adaptation directed by Lawrence Gordon Clark, but for ITV (Yorkshire Television) rather than the BBC. It updates the story to 1970s Leeds and makes great use of bleak, snowy locations. It also makes the protagonist a woman (Jan Francis) and has her working in TV journalism, instead of academia. It’s atmospheric and unsettling but, like the original story, also has an element of suspense and adventure.

    Network DVD (out of print, eBay) | YouTube

    9. Ghost in the Water, 1982

    This was made for children and it shows, being more Grange Hill than Lawrence Gordon Clark. It’s about working class children investigating a haunting in the industrial landscape of the English Midlands – all canals, comprehensive schools and council estates. The lead actors are amateurs and their performances sit somewhere between monotonous and annoying. But, still, that arguably adds to the unusual feel of the piece. It was directed by Renny Rye and based on a story by Edward Chitham.

    BBC DVD (Google it) | YouTube

    10. Classic Ghost Stories: Wailing Well, 1986

    This series of five 15-minute Jackanory-style readings of M.R. James stories by Robert Powell is more effective than you might expect. They’re all good but I’ve singled out this one as a story that hasn’t, as far as I know, been adapted elsewhere. They were offered as extras on my BFI DVD set of the BBC Christmas ghost stories and are also available as a standalone disc.

    BFI DVD | YouTube

    11. The Woman in Black, 1989

    I hesitate to mention this as it’s so well known, and feature length. But the mood and feel is so close to the work of Lawrence Gordon Clark that I can’t exclude it from the list. It was also hard to see for a long time, until the defunct label Network released a Blu-ray in 2020. It was adapted for ITV by Nigel Kneale from Susan Hill’s 1983 novel and was filmed partly on location at Osea in Essex. It’s fantastically moody and also has one legendary jump scare that still works even when you know it’s coming.

    Network Blu-ray (Google it) | Amazon Prime streaming

    12. Ghosts: Three Miles Up, 1995

    An adaptation of Elizabeth Jane Howard’s classic of weird fiction made for a short-lived BBC anthology series. It takes some liberties with the original story but catches some of the mood – and also borrows from Lawrence Gordon Clark that love of desolate but beautiful English landscapes. It’s about two brothers who try to fix their relationship by going on a canal boat holiday together. It’s already going badly when they pick up a strange girl and things get really strange.

    YouTube

    Categories
    Fiction

    FICTION: Dead in a ditch

    Where is the worst place you could end up haunting? I reckon my spots a contender. It was bad from day one, standing knee deep in the green water of a ditch, looking down on my own smashed body in the half-submerged hatchback.

    Then it took them three months to find me, even right there by the main road between town and the village, because the reeds were high. I watched my body bloat and fart bog gas and liquify. I watched rats and insects help themselves to my flesh. I saw my bones emerge like the wreckage of a ship on the shoreline with the tide sliding out.

    I tried not to look. I took an interest in the clouds in the big sky above the levels, and in the trees as they began to yellow at the edges and drop their leaves. I watched sunrises, sunsets, and stared at the stars – I could see them so clearly out there in total darkness. I counted cars, too, as they flew by. You’re going too fast, I thought, and remembered that people kept saying that to me, too.

    Then, when the trees were bare with black branches, a car passed slowly enough that a child in the back seat saw the low sun catch the roof of the wreck. The car stopped at a layby a little way along the road into town. I could hear the burr of its engine and the tick of its hazard lights above the breath of the westerly wind. The police car came a little later and the road was closed. Then an ambulance. Then, just after dark, a forensics team with floodlights and tents. Finally, a pickup truck from a garage in town arrived and, by dawn, the car was gone, and it was just me and the dirty water around my jeans.

    Mum and Dad came, parking at the roadside. Cars kept passing at twenty above the limit, one or two honking their horns in irritation at the blockage in the road. My parents couldn’t see or hear me as I murmured to them: ‘It’s alright, don’t miss me, don’t feel pain for me…’ Before they departed they left a stuffed monkey, a bunch of flowers in a heavy stone pot, and a card I couldn’t read. In the weeks that followed I watched the card blow away in the wash from an articulated lorry, the monkey turn ragged and grow green mould, and the flowers rot to black stalks. I didn’t see Mum and Dad again. I suppose they drove the long way round to town after that, so as not to have to think about me.

    After a long while I got tuned into the other dead around and about. There was a pale smudge in the field opposite that I thought must once have been a woman. She seemed young and was always stooped, always weeping. The sound sometimes carried on the wind. She might have been there since the Civil War, or long before. One night in June I watched a Douglas C-47 with black and white invasion stripes on its tail pass silently overhead and fade out of existence somewhere over the old airfield. I learned that the famous Headless Horseman was real, too, though less glamorous than in the stories they told around town. He passed by, once a month or so, and was a nasty old thing. He had a dirty tunic streaked with brown blood and his head was in his lap, crushed and misshapen, but still screaming. He was always in a hurry to be somewhere. On summer evenings, if there wasn’t too much traffic, and the wind was right, I could hear the sounds of the battle of 1685 being replayed on the field outside the village. The teachers from the village school used to take us there to camp out, and tell us ghost stories as we toasted bread over a fire.

    Years must have passed before I saw Dani again. I’d dropped her off in town before making that last journey and I suppose she had no reason to come to the village after I’d gone. Then one day, there she was, in the driver’s seat of her own hatchback, framed in the open window. She was a little older but no less beautiful. After the car had passed I realised there was also someone in the passenger seat. An hour later, she drove back and I saw her for another two seconds, a face in shadow, her hands on the wheel. I also saw that the man sitting next to her had a broad chest and tidy beard.

    I’d always wondered how eternity would work. Wouldn’t you get bored? In life, I could hardly sit still, and was always after a distraction or a thrill. That’s probably why I drove so fast all the time, to feel not-boredom for a few minutes. But boredom, it turns out, is only a problem for the living. It comes out of being anxious the whole time about your status and how much you’ve achieved. It does us all right in the survival game. It keeps us moving and exploring. In death, though, you let time wash over you in an endless stream. I wasn’t waiting. I didn’t expect anything, or hope for anything. I just was, and just am.

    If there was anything I longed for, and longing’s too strong a word, it was to see Dani again. When I died, the wires that connected me to the world were cut, but the cut wasn’t clean. An intermittent contact made me feel something, or remember how it felt to feel something, or something like that.

    She passed along the road many times after that. Alone in the car; with the man; following a removal van; dressed for work in her supermarket uniform; dressed for a Christmas party in a sparkling silver dress, with the man in a shimmering suit; and in a wedding dress in a vintage car with ribbons tied to its radiator. Their car got bigger, the backseat gained a baby seat, then a baby, then two babies. They drove too fast, of course, because everyone did. The car hugged the bend, lifted a little one one side, always ready to tip.

    Through cycles of sun and moon, summer and winter, flood and drought, I stood there with water boatmen skidding around my knees, and rats circling. The creatures knew I was there, somehow, in some simple way, because they never touched me, or went through me, or whatever would have happened.

    There was no way for me to make any difference in the world, I knew that for sure. Still, I always wanted Dani’s car to break down as it passed me, so I thought hard about it, and one day, it did. I felt as if I’d made it happen. The engine cut out and she began to drift. She guided it into the verge and put on the hazard lights. Then she got out and walked along the road directly in front of me.

    Her fine blonde hair had just begun to turn grey and there were new folds and grooves around her eyes. Speaking into her phone she said:

    ‘About halfway, yes, just past Crockford Farm.’

    It was the first time I’d heard her voice in all these years and I experienced something like a memory of how it felt to yearn for someone. I remembered, for a sliver of a moment, how a sweet harvest apple tasted and what it meant to smell the sea.

    While she waited for the mechanics to come, she leaned on a gate and, resting her chin on her arms, looked out over a field of yellow rapeseed.

    Did she remember this was where it had happened? Did she ever know?

    The recovery vehicle came, its orange lights throwing twists of fire on the surface of the filthy ditchwater. Within a few minutes the engine of her car was turning over. She put the radio on and I heard two bars of a song I didn’t know before she waved to the mechanic and sped off.

    Over the years, Dani kept passing, back and forth, like an irregular pendulum, village to town, town to village. The car changed, and she changed, but I didn’t.

    Her children got their own cars, which they drove much too fast, and I wondered if she ever used my story as a warning.

    One day, after I suppose decades must have gone by, Dani appeared dressed in black in the back of a limousine, following a hearse.

    A few years after that, the hearse passed again, and this time Dani’s children were in the black car that followed.

    That night, the Headless Horseman passed, screaming mad, as usual. I screamed back.


    The cover of Intervals of Darkness with quotes from John Grindrod and Rowan Lee.

    If you enjoyed this story you’ll probably also enjoy my collections Intervals of Darkness (2024) and Municipal Gothic (2022).

    Categories
    Intervals of Darkness

    Introducing Intervals of Darkness

    My new book, Intervals of Darkness, with 14 weird stories, is now out.

    You can buy it as a paperback or eBook more-or-less anywhere in the world, including

    From the ghosts of marching soldiers haunting marshland to delivery drivers lost in nightmarish tower blocks, and from reanimated skulls to psychogeographers encountering ancient spirits on council recreation grounds, it’s a wide-ranging collection direct from my subconscious to you.

    I hope you enjoy it.

    Praise for Intervals of Darkness

    “Newman returns to haunted Britain with fourteen more wonderful stories… Fans of folk horror and weird fiction will find a lot to love in this collection.” – Rowan Lee in her review at The Harvest Maid’s Revenge

    “Impressively eerie and packed with shocks, Intervals of Darkness ushers the reader through 1970s grime and Gothic opulence, with moments of powerful poignancy and startling strangeness. You’ll want to linger over these stories.” – Verity Holloway, editor of Cloister Fox and author of Pseudotooth and The Others of Edenwell

    “Housing estates, factories, tower blocks and caravans, nowhere is safe from Ray Newman’s dark imagination. Existing somewhere between Robert Aickman and JG Ballard, these blackly funny tales are sure to chill you, no matter how high you turn the central heating. It’s every bit the equal of Municipal Gothic, and if anything it’s darker and stranger.” – John Grindrod, author of Concretopia, Iconicon and Outskirts

    “You don’t know what you’re getting next – Cronenberg in a dingy terrace, Tim Powers jumping at shadows, M.R. James in a piss-soaked alley. The canvas feels bigger than Municipal Gothic.” Thom Willis, editor of Microwrites

    “Witty, creepy, moving, and brilliantly written weird fiction…” – Jamie Evans

    “Chilling, atmospheric and darkly witty.” – Stephen Graves, director of The Dead of Winter

    How I wrote these stories

    I’ve written a ‘behind the scenes’ breakdown of each story in the collection without, I hope, any spoilers. A friend has been reading each story, then reading my notes, and that’s probably a good approach.